The Money Box

What Do You Believe?

I have been thinking a lot about money lately.

Not just how much money I want to make or what my financial goals are. I have been thinking about what I actually believe about money.

There is a big difference.

For a long time, I carried a belief that I wasn’t worthy of money.

That’s hard to admit, but it’s true.

I could set goals, I could work hard, I could tell myself that I wanted to make more money. But underneath all of that was still this belief that somehow money wasn’t meant for me.

And when you carry a belief like that long enough, it starts making decisions for you.

You question what you’re worth.

You see an opportunity and immediately start thinking about why it might not work.

You get money and worry about losing it.

I still catch myself doing some of those things.

That’s what got me thinking about what I call the money box.

What’s in your money box?

All of us have experiences with money.

Maybe you grew up without much of it. Maybe money caused arguments in your home. Maybe you watched someone lose everything. Maybe you were taught that wanting money was greedy. Maybe you’ve made financial mistakes yourself.

Those experiences are real.

But somewhere along the way, our experiences can become beliefs.

Money is hard to make.

There is never enough.

People like me don’t make that kind of money.

I’m not good with money.

I’m not worthy of having money.

Those beliefs start building the walls of the money box.

I know because I’ve lived in mine.

But I’m starting to understand something.

My past experiences with money do not have to become my future beliefs about money.

My past is evidence of what I experienced. It is not a prediction of where I am going.

That changes things.

Belief is the key

I used to think the goal was simply to make more money.

Now I’m not so sure.

I think before I can change my relationship with money, I have to recognize what I believe about it.

Because if I believe scarcity, I’m going to make decisions from scarcity.

I may hold back.

I may protect.

I may hesitate.

I may see risk before I see possibility.

But if I believe there is opportunity and that I am capable of handling money responsibly, I can make a different decision.

That doesn’t mean I can sit on the couch, believe I’m going to be wealthy and wait for the cheque to show up.

Belief still requires action.

And this is where intentionality comes in.

Belief opens the money box. Intentional action is how we step out of it.

For me, that might mean having the conversation I have been avoiding.

Making the call.

Putting a value on the work I do.

Taking an opportunity instead of immediately finding ten reasons why I shouldn’t.

Making a financial decision based on where I am going instead of where I have been.

Those actions begin creating new evidence.

And with evidence comes trust.

Money and trust

I don’t want money to determine my status.

I don’t want the amount in my bank account to determine my worth.

Money doesn’t get to decide who Arlen is.

Instead, I am learning to see money as a gift and a responsibility.

Can I trust myself with money?

Can I be responsible with it?

Can I be intentional with it?

Can I make decisions about money without allowing fear to make those decisions for me?

I believe I can.

And every time I make an intentional decision around money, I have another piece of evidence that says, Yes, I can trust myself here.

That belief is very different from the one I used to carry.

And I know the old one will probably show up again.

That’s okay.

When it does, I can recognize it.

I can look at the belief behind it.

And then I can choose my response.

Today I choose

Today I choose to believe that money doesn’t determine my worth.

I choose to believe that my past experiences with money don’t have to dictate my future with it.

I choose to believe that I can be responsible with money, intentional with money and trusted with money.

And then I have to take the next step that supports that belief.

Because maybe the money box isn’t nearly as complicated as I once thought.

Maybe the key really is belief.

But turning the key is only the beginning.

Today I choose to step out of the box.

Belief opens the box. Choice gets me moving. Intentional action builds the evidence. And evidence builds trust.

Resources:

The Four Brains of Money – Dr. Alok Trivedi

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