The Thought Model: How Your Thinking Drives Results
Years ago, if you walked into my house around 6 p.m., you could feel the tension. I was quick to anger. My family wasn’t sure which version of me was walking through the door, and honestly—neither was I.
When I first heard the idea that your thoughts create your emotions, which drive your actions and results, I was skeptical. It felt too neat for the mess of real life. But I tested it. In small, ordinary moments.
One night, I caught myself snapping at my family after a frustrating day. The fact was simple: dinner was late and a work issue was unresolved. My first thought was, “No one respects my time.” That thought produced anger. That anger produced blame. The result? Distance—the opposite of what I actually wanted.
The next time, I chose a different thought: “We’re all tired. I can bring steadiness here.” That thought produced calm. Calm gave me options. I asked two questions, finished the issue in ten minutes, and we ate together. Same circumstance; different thought. Different result.
That was the turning point: I don’t control everything, but I do control the next thought I choose. My actions—and my results—follow. That realization changed my leadership and my home.
This is why I teach the Thought Model. Not as theory, but as a practical way to lead without fear or control.
The Thought Model, in plain language
Most problems leaders face aren’t purely operational. They’re mindset problems that show up as operational issues. The Thought Model makes that visible:
Circumstances → Thoughts → Feelings → Actions → Results
- Circumstances are the facts. “The proposal was late.”
- Thoughts are the story you add. “They don’t care,” or “We’re stretched and missing signals.”
- Feelings flow from thoughts. Defensive, curious, calm, frustrated.
- Actions follow feelings. Micromanage, ignore, ask questions, reset expectations.
- Results reflect the original thought. If you assume people don’t care, you’ll act in ways that erode ownership. If you assume there’s a solvable gap, you’ll create learning and better work.
The model isn’t about positive thinking. It’s about taking responsibility for the one lever you fully control—your thinking—so your actions produce the results you actually want.
Bringing in the FACTOR framework: trust, intentionality, and purpose
Before we get tactical, here’s how I weave my own story into the model. The shift didn’t happen because I tried to be more positive. It happened because I learned to choose thoughts that honored three anchors:
Your thoughts are the hinge that swings the whole door. The FACTOR framework is how you choose thoughts that build the outcomes you need:
- Trust — Start by grounding your thoughts in trust: trust in yourself as a leader-in-progress, trust in your people’s intent, and trust in reality (facts over assumptions). Trust calms urgency and opens your view.
- Intentionality — Choose thoughts on purpose. “What thought would lead me to the best action here?” This is not spin. It’s disciplined attention to what’s true and useful.
- Purpose — Align your thoughts with the outcome you’re building toward: clarity, healthy accountability, and sustainable results—not fear and control.
When leaders combine trust, intentionality, and purpose at the Thought step, their actions and results shift fast.
Two quick scenarios
Scenario 1: Missed deadline
- Circumstance: Proposal was delivered one day late.
- Default thought: “I can’t rely on them.” → Feeling: irritated. → Action: step in, rewrite, lecture. → Result: Less ownership next time.
- FACTOR thought: “We missed signals. I can surface them and reset the system.” → Feeling: steady. → Action: review handoffs, clarify deadlines, agree on a buffer. → Result: Fewer misses and more trust.
Scenario 2: Underperforming hire
- Circumstance: New coordinator makes repeated errors.
- Default thought: “Bad hire.” → Feeling: resigned. → Action: avoid coaching, wait it out. → Result: Ongoing errors.
- FACTOR thought: “There’s a capability or clarity gap I can identify.” → Feeling: engaged. → Action: tighten SOPs, shorten feedback loops, train on two core tasks. → Result: Measurable improvement or a clear decision—without drama.
A simple Thought → Result practice you can use today
This is the same practice I used to move from reactivity to steadiness:
Use this five-minute tool after any frustrating moment:
- Name the circumstance (facts only).
- Write your first thought. Don’t judge it; make it visible.
- Check for trust. What am I assuming about myself, my team, or reality? What’s actually true?
- Choose an intentional, purpose-aligned thought. One sentence that would lead you to your best next action.
- Act and review. What did you do? What result followed? What will you repeat or adjust?
Repeat this for a week. Patterns show up quickly.
Common traps to watch for
- Blame loops. If your thought starts with “they always” or “they never,” you’re likely in a loop. Shift back to facts and your role.
- Urgency theater. Rushing feels productive but often hides unclear priorities. Purpose realigns the work.
- Binary thinking. It’s rarely “keep or fire” or “yes or no.” Look for one right-sized step.
A one-page worksheet (use it with your team)
Copy this grid into your notes for your next 1:1 or post-mortem:
- Circumstance (facts):
- My first thought:
- Result that thought would create if I act from it:
- Trust check (what’s true / what’s assumed):
- Intentional, purpose-aligned thought:
- One action I’ll take today:
- What I learned / what changes next time:
Use the same structure with your team so they learn to think, decide, and act without you carrying every decision.
Why this matters for small teams
When teams are ten people or fewer, your thinking scales faster than any SOP. Your thought becomes the cultural cue. Choose trust. Be intentional. Stay tied to purpose. Results follow.
I used to be the angry guy. Learning this model didn’t make life perfect; it made me responsible. That responsibility built trust at home and at work—and it’s why I coach leaders through the same shift.
Next step: If you struggle with anger issues leading your team or if you know you want to get better at communicating with yourself and those around you I would love to hear your story. Feel free to email me.
Resources:
Gap and the Gain – Benjemin Hardy and Dan Sulivan
Why Strong Leaders take 5 Minutes to get clear








